My Red Wings Conspiracy Theory

On Wednesday, May 14, 2008, the Detroit Red Wings lost to the Dallas Stars, who had managed to avoid being swept in the NHL Western Conference Finals.

The 3-1 defeat of the Red Wings – who had won nine straight, going into the game – was a not just a victory for the Stars. The officials won the game, too.

In the first period, the Wings scored, but the goal was waved off because Tomas Holmstrom’s ASS was in the crease. WHAT??

That goal could have effectively shut up the Star-crazy fans in attendance. But because it was waved off, the Stars and their fans still held a lot of hope. The Stars scored, and at the start of the next period, the Wings scored to tie it up.

By this time, however, momentum was clearly on the side of the Stars, and they took advantage by taking their 3-1 win.

Yes, there is no crying in hockey. The Wings will win this series anyway. But here is what I think TRULY happened that night:

It is no secret that hockey is struggling for fans. The fact that Versus is the only channel showing the damn games (available on Comcast, but NOT WOW!) simply does not help. Who watches Versus anyway (besides me – they have coverage of bike races, including the Tour de France)?

Anyhow, Game 5 in this series will be broadcast on ABC TV on Saturday, May 17. ABC makes hockey available to more people than Versus does. As a result, ABC can demand higher money for commercial time. If the Wings had won Game 4 in Dallas, then ABC would not have had a game to show, and thus, no ludicrous commercial money.

My theory is that ABC greased NHL commissioner Gary Bettman’s palms. Maybe they offered him a bit-part in “Grey’s Anatomy”, or gave him inside information on who will win “Dancing With the Stars” (hey, how’s THAT for irony! Dancing with the Stars/Dallas Stars… hmmmm…). In return, Bettman might have told his officials, “Okay, guys, if the Wings score first, wave the goal off. I will contact you via these tiny communications devices, which you will put in your ear, and I will provide a reason that the goal should be waved off.”

So when the Wings scored, it coincided with Bettman returning from the bathroom, and accidently sitting on a slice of pizza, which he had forgotten that he had placed it there when he ran to the john. And just for kicks, let’s say that it was Little Caesar’s pizza.

Anyhow, the official waved off the goal as directed, and waited for Bettman’s word.

So Bettman, worried about potential stains on his suit, says to the people around him, “Look at my ASS! It’s got GREASE on it!”

The official was struggling with the noise of the crowd and heard: “…ASS… CREASE…!” He then declared the goal was no good because of the never heard of rule that the player’s ASS was in the crease.

As a result, everyone is happy – except for Wings’ fans… and Gary Bettman, who has get buy a new suit.

That’s my theory – not yours.

The Wonders

I swear that every time I volunteer at Gilda’s Club, something magical happens.

First, I want to say that I am one of the people saddened by Chris’ departure to Nashville. Chris and I had a few of those intensely powerful conversations together, that has helped me come to understand myself, and my life. And every time I walked into Gilda’s Club and saw Chris, we had that bond between us. I will miss seeing her on a semi-regular basis, but I am tickled to death for her great Nashville adventure! Godspeed to you, Chris! May all of the best wishes that everyone has given to you bear wonderful, glorious fruit!

So I was blessed with a discussion with someone I had seen quite regularly around the clubhouse. She pulled me aside and told me that she was the mother of someone I grew up with in Madison Heights! This is poignant to me because (at the risk of upsetting my mother) the 11 years I spent growing up in Madison Heights were the happiest years of my life – prior to meeting my wife!

I am blessed with having amazing memories of my childhood before we moved to Sterling Heights. Life was so innocent and carefree. We couldn’t wait to get outside and play, and we were bummed out when the streetlights came on and we had to go home.

I have always been able to develop phenomenal friendships, but it was after we moved that I became extremely shy. But I look back on those friendships I had before I was 12, and find that I miss them terribly.

By telling me that I had grown up with her daughter, this woman unleashed a flood of happy memories and even some melancholy yearning. I specifically remember this girl because the first moment I laid eyes on her, I thought she looked like a cousin of mine. I was even a hair away from calling her my cousin’s name, when I heard her real name.

After each and every visit, I feel more and more involved in the Gilda’s community – even though I haven’t been there so much in the past year or two.

There’s a great world out there, and although I may occasionally live in the past, it is my present that shows so much opportunity…

Names Can Last a Lifetime

What is it about names? I just came to realize that sometimes a name can fulfill someone’s destiny.

For instance:

* I work with an illustrator whose name is Art.
* Sheryl’s nephew’s name is Hunter. Good thing his dad wasn’t an avid bowler! Then what would we call him? Turkey?
* What does my name (Matt) say? That people walk all over me?
* My friends Pat and Pat(ti) have two dogs.. and cats.
* I know a Bill who deals with money.

It’s interesting if you think about it.

It’s not always true, though, my brother Van drives a car.

Priorities Schmiorities

I’m contemplating going back to school to get my MBA for the purpose of making myself more valuable to my company, as well as allowing myself more opportunities in the future.

The problem is that I don’t know if I am willing to commit to a three-year program.

When I was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s in 2002, I decided that I will do only what I want to in life. The financial, social and personal commitment to an MBA can be pretty daunting to someone like me.

So once again, I’ve got to ask myself: What is important? What are my priorities?

When it comes down to it, the answer is simple.

I wanna dance!

What I Learned at the Nightingale Awards

It’s not just Sheryl:

1) Nurses (in general) struggle with honors.

To be a great nurse, one must be purely selfless as things relate to the patient. The great ones simply don’t think of themselves. Therefore, when an honor is bestowed, the great nurse is smacked upside the head with the reality that they are actually accomplishing something positive. It is a moment when the great nurse realizes that they do matter – and that concept goes completely against their constitution. It’s unfathomable to them.

Sheryl and I actually run into the "selfless situation" every day, whether she knows it or not. Since we are both givers, we want to please the other person. A discussion about what to have for dinner can take a surprising amount of time sometimes because I want her to be happy with the choice, yet she doesn’t think about that. All she’s concerned about is what she can do for me – she wants me to be happy with the choice. Ain't that sumthin'??.

Many of the Nightingale winners thanked their co-workers for helping them earn the award. Some even thanked their patients and their patients’ families for inspiring them. NOT A SINGLE ONE SAID THEY FELT THEY EARNED IT.

2) Nurses are crazily humble.

They said it themselves! Each of the nine winners said they were humbled to receive the award. This tells me that although they may have struggled with the honor, they were able to recognize that someone felt they deserved it – and they took it for whatever it was worth.

3) Great nurses love their job.

I have said time and time again that Sheryl and I are blessed to have jobs we love. However, again, every single award winner last night mentioned that they love their job. By looking at them while they talked about their work, you could see it in their eyes.

A couple of years ago, my college roommate told me about the Jim Collins book “Good to Great”. The book discusses similar traits in companies that have gone from mediocrity to greatness.

But what does it take for an individual to go from good to great? If we take a few lessons from nurses, here’s what I think:

* To be great at what you do, you’ve got to love it.
* Be humble, yet be able to accept recognition graciously.
* Acknowledge those whom have helped pave the way to your success – whether they are mentors, teachers, parents, or heroes.
* Be selfless. Strive for the success of what you do – not for your selfish needs.
* Smile. Nearly everyone can feel a sense of calmness and security when someone is giving them a smile. Nurses hug a lot, too… maybe there is something to that.
* Have patience, and understand that whoever you’re dealing with might not be on top of their game. We’re only human, ya know?

The Nightingale awards gave extremely worthy people a chance to be a rockstar for the night. It will be a night the never forget, and hopefully, their stories will inspire others to achieve greatness.

Godspeed, nurses! Mama Florence would be proud!

Plain, or with bacon and cheese?

Sometimes, life needs to be one big scrambled egg in order to remember what is important.

Sheryl and I have a lot going on right now. Our home improvement projects are in full swing, and with spring finally rearing its head, our activity level is ramping up, too.

Sheryl is crazy busy with work, and tomorrow is the Nightingale award ceremony.

So with all of this going on, it’s easy to lose ourselves.

Unfortunately, it takes one of us getting overwhelmed before we remember to stop and smell the occasional rose.

We need to remember to take baby steps – that the joy is in the journey, and not necessarily the destination. And this time, when I say “we”, I mean everyone.

We’ve gotten to the point where even tearing someone apart in the media has become entertainment. Is it really fun?

Sometimes, though, it can be justified. For instance, Sheryl and I have personal satisfaction in the Kwame Kilpatrick beatdown. Her entertainment is a result of a chance Thanksgiving breakfast at McDonald’s.

Sheryl, her nephew and I had just finished scarfing our breakfast burritos, and were getting ready to leave, when “King Kwame” and his posse showed up, nudging Sheryl out of the way as they queued up for their McGriddle sandwiches.

As we made our way to the door, we found ourselves locked in! Yes, McDonald’s went into lockdown while Kwame snagged some grindage.

Outside, in the single digit weather, a nicely dressed woman and boy were stuck outside. Turns out they were Kwame’s wife and son. Nice. Another guy just wanted to use the restroom to shed some extra clothing, since he was going to the Lions game. No such luck. Kwame’s posse needed EXTREME SECURITY.

Now come on, I don’t care who you are. If you are going to McDonald’s, for Christsakes, YOU DO NOT NEED TO LOCK THE PLACE DOWN.

Sheryl and I can think of hundreds of everyday people who deserve to be treated like a king, and Kwame throws his physical and political weight around so he can be treated like a king while ordering a freaking egg McMuffin…

Is it any surprise that we have some enjoyment watching “the king” get knocked down a few rungs?

Justified or not, we – as human being - need to start looking for, and treating everyday folks like the kings and heroes they are in their own lives. For every bad parent we hear about on the news, there are 20, or 1,000, or 100,000 great parents. For every bad kid, there are thousands of good kids.

It’s time to honor those people, as well as those we love – and not just on a Hallmark holiday. Treat your loved ones like kings or heroes, but remember that we are all human and have faults. One of the biggest faults I see is this emergence of the “entitled generation”, who may have already been treated like princes and princesses their whole lives and don’t know how to really exert themselves to be a productive human being.

My nomination of Sheryl for the Nightingale awards is my attempt to thank Sheryl on behalf of her hundreds and thousands of patients throughout the years. I suspect she has no doubts how much I love her. This Sunday is Mother’s day, and I suspect, too, that if you asked my mom what I thought of her, she would tell you that regardless of whether she receives Mother’s day presents, I love her very much, too.

As with everyone in my life whom I care deeply for, Sheryl and Mom have earned it. But that’s who they are, and they would admit to having no clue what I am talking about.

So the question becomes, who – or what – is important in your scrambled egg?