Sweet Torture

When I was training to ride across Montana, I was maintaining a blistering pace of 200+ miles per week, but I struggled to recover on many days.

I would change my diet, drink protein shakes, swallow snot-consistency power gels, and oftentimes nothing worked. I would lay in bed the next day having a difficult time getting up.

"Getting old," I'd say to no one in particular.

So I tried to rest more. Which was fine. I never thought a lot about it.

Knowing what I know now, I can look at those moments as potential Sjogren's episodes. And the reason I say that is because I feel the same way these days - after my workouts at the Y - particularly after a strong cardio session.

My legs feel like worn out rubber bands held together with plaster of paris.

"Getting old?" I ask to no one in particular.

I dunno. In my mind, I don't work any harder than anyone else who isn't as exhausted as I am. Am I a sissy? In the back of my mind, I think so. But at the same time, there is still enough doubt to where I can attribute it to Sjogren's - without feeling guilty.

I try not to let it get the best of me, period. Today, I still plan to hit the weights at the Y. I'll probably do less cardio (if any) because my legs are wasted. I can then recover (aside from painting our bathroom and generally putzing around) for three days before our next swim class.

The thing that really sucks though, is always wondering if I am using my ailments as a crutch. If I am, how do I really know whether I need a break, or whether I need to suck it up?

And to make it worse, I am a cyclist at heart, which to a degree makes me yearn for physical discomfort.

So many questions. Wouldn't it be nice to be able to get definitive answers on our healthcare questions like athletes and stars do?

Oy, that is another egg to crack... not for today, though.

Have no fear, my friends, that whining sound you hear tonight will just be lil' ol' me. Have a laugh on my behalf, because I will certainly deserve it!